The Poachie Bowl

Happy Thursday!

Today, let's talk about the best quick dinner recipe in the world (seriously!). I'm going to make a bold statement here and say that adding a perfectly poached egg to just about any savory dish instantly makes it swoon worthy. Add glorious chunks of fresh avocado, tangy kimchi, and spicy siracha to that equation? Heaven.



Combine the above mentioned ingredients and add some hearty brown rice and garlic sauteed greens .....BAM...  The Poachie Bowl. Now, I can't take credit for inventing the poachie bowl. My mom used to make a version of this meal for herself when my Dad was traveling for work and she wanted something simple, comforting, nutrient dense, and supremely delish. I don't know about you, but during the week, I don't like to spend much time in the kitchen preparing elaborate dinners. I mean, ain't nobody got time for that! (if you do, please send me an invite for dinner, and I will be happy to enjoy the fruits of your labor... hehe.) My mom and I were chatting one day about weeknight meal prep, and she shared this easy go-to meal with me. Well, she created a monster. PJ and I now have poachie bowls once a week (at least!), and admittedly, I could probably eat this same thing every night for dinner and die a happy woman.
The staple ingredients in The Poachie Bowl are brown rice, avocado, poached eggs, and siracha. The extras (i.e. greens and veggies) can easily be swapped for whatever leftover veggies you have on hand! Also, quinoa works great instead of brown rice, but I personally think the nutty flavor or the brown rice makes the dish. Just sayin' :)

Now, one of the most important parts of this bowl of goodness is getting the poached eggs right. I have had some major fails in this department.

photo credit

BUT... after much trial and error, I think I am finally a poaching aficionado.There are numerous tutorials on how to perfectly poach an egg, but my go to method is as follows:

1. Add a small dash of vinegar to a pan of steadily simmering water.

2.  Crack egg individually into a ramekin or cup

3. Create a gentle whirlpool in the water to help the egg white wrap around the yolk.

4. Slowly tip the egg into the water, white first. Leave to cook for three minutes.

5.Remove with a slotted spoon

6. Drain onto kitchen paper

I have the bowl all ready so I can just plop the poachies on top! Happy poaching and eating!

The Poachie Bowl

(serves one)

• 1-2 poached eggs


• 1 cup of cooked brown basmati rice (or quinoa)


• 1/2 ripe avocado, sliced


• 1/4-1/3 cup jarred kimchi, diced


• 1 cup sauteed greens of choice (my favorite is swiss chard or kale sauteed in garlic and coconut oil!)


• 1-2 cloves of minced garlic


• 1 tsp-tbsp coconut oil


• Siracha to taste


• Optional: leftover roasted veggies (i.e. asparagus, zucchini, brussels)


• Optional Garnishes: sesame seeds, scallions

Saute your greens with coconut oil and minced garlic. Heat (or cook) leftover brown rice. Mix brown rice with chopped kimchi. I occasionally add a small dash of soy sauce (tamari) in addition to the kimchi, but it's not really necessary. Place greens in the bottom of your bowl. Top with kimchi rice mixture, any additional veggies, poached egg, chunked avocado, and siracha. Garnish with scallion and sesame seeds. Now enjoy, smile, and rub your happy belly!

**Note: This bowl can be totally customized.  For example, my mom does not use kimchi in her bowl. Instead, she heats a little sesame oil and adds the cooked rice into the pan and mixes with a bit of soy sauce. Sometimes I add extra roasted veggies, sometimes I don't. It all depends on what I have any hanging around. I will say that the roasted asparagus was a fantastic addition to this epic bowl, and I would probably add it again.

From me to you :) Bon appetit!

Love and Hugs,
Sarah

Who am I?

Hi there my little spring tulips!



 

How are you? I hope that you have been enjoying the slightly warmer temps that have finally graced us here in the Northeast.  As much as I love a good sweater, I am more than ready to not look at them for another 6 months.



Alright- moving on from sweaters to self love. Let's face it- the world we live in- and more specifically the media- tells us that who we are is defined by our physical appearance and how much time and effort we put into perfecting it. People begin to take on their physicality as the main marker of who they are. Have you not identified someone else (or yourself!) as being the healthy eater, the dedicated cross fitter, the perfect yogi, the die-hard gym goer, the always put together fashion maven, the vegan, the vegetarian, or the paleo person? Come on, we have all done it. We are on a never ending journey of self discovery, which we are constantly being told starts with assigning labels to "things" about ourselves. I can't tell you how many amazing people I have spoken with that have confessed they felt the need to get a hobby or a passion project to feel like they have something to tell people that they are interested in. They feel like they need that something to label themselves as.

 



Now don't get me wrong... hobbies and interests are amazing. We can LOVE our yoga practice or putting together interesting ensembles that say  to the world, "Hey, today is a say something hat day!" ( To Wong Foo reference, hehehe). These things can make us feel strong, capable, and creative, which is all good stuff, right? Right. However, I would challenge that these things are not at the core of  who we really are.



I have spent the majority of my adult life allowing food, weight, exercise, and body image to define who I am. Honestly, I wasn't even fully cognizant that these were the measures by which I defined myself. If you asked me who I was, I would take that to mean what are the things that set me apart? My answer would probably be: I'm a diligent yogi, a healthy cooking connoisseur, a minimalist fashion lover. The thing is... what if I broke my legs and couldn't practice yoga, or I had a job where I traveled 80% of the time and couldn't cook, or I had to wear a uniform to everyday? Then who would I be? The point is, these "defining characteristics" could be gone in a second. Therefore, they can't be who I am, but instead, things that I like. There is freedom in this, people. What this means is that you don't need to keep searching for that "thing" to define yourself by. At the core or your being, who you are is already there. You have everything that you need right in that big beautiful heart of yours.

Over the past couple of months, I have been encouraged to make a two lists. The first list was who am I . The caveat was that this list could have NOTHING to do with food, weight, body image, or exercise. In addition, I also listed what makes me feel a sense of purpose. I'm not going to lie, these were challenging exercises for me, but they were so worth it. I realized that striving for labels is unnecessary, because I have all of these wonderful things that make me who I am naturally.  I am going to share these lists  with you and encourage you to do this exercise for yourself.  You are so much more that what you look like, or the "things" that you do or have. Remember, you already have everything that you need.

Who am I?

I am a loving wife

I am a loving daughter

I am an empathetic friend

I am a future mother

I am a compassionate soul

I am a diligent worker

I am a dreamer

I am a person who does not judge or hold grudges

I am an eternal optimist

I am spiritual

I am a learner

I am flexible, adaptable, and I accept change

I am strong

I feel like I have a sense of purpose when:

I am serving

Being a good listener

Providing insight and ideas that help and empower people

Teaching

Learning something new and exciting that I can share

Being authentic and sharing my "imperfections" to help others feel less alone

Giving love

Contributing to a cause that I am passionate about

 

Have a wonderful Wednesday.

 

Love and Hugs,

Sarah

 

 

And after another hiatus...

Hey There!

Happy Easter to those of you who celebrate. I hope you have all been well over these past few months. While I have greatly enjoyed yet another break from social media, I am ready to return to my little corner of the blogesphere. On a side note, while I would really love you to continue reading the blog, I highly recommend that you treat yourself to a total social media detox at least once! It's amazing how much time we spend creepin'.  I mean, don't get me wrong- it's kinda fun- but it can make you a little nuts after a while!

Oh, hey there :)

So, what can you expect from me now that I'm back? More nutritious and delicious meal ideas...

a sprinkling of style...

lots of personal self development musings and updates...

 yoga love...

and plenty of cameos from my favorite people...

and animals...

Stay tuned!!!

...and a little spiritual nugget for the road :)

The Beauty Myth

Hi There!

How's everyone doing? Things over in my neck of the woods are pretty good. The week started off  busy, and I really can't believe it's already Wednesday.



On Monday, I drove to upstate New York for work. As much as I wasn't excited about the three hour drive each way, the beautiful foliage (and lunch box full of snackies!) made the trek a complete pleasure if you can believe it. It was so nice to escape the city and simply take in some beautiful scenery and breathe in the crisp fall air.

In other news ,I'm super psyched about this new hat I picked up from Targ-et! It makes me feel kind of badass... I don't know why, it just does :)

So, speaking of badass, in my last post, I told y'all (I'm sorry, I love saying y'all) that in the coming weeks, I would be sharing some of the ways that I am calling bullshit on this idea that I (or you!!!) somehow need "fixing". We are faced with a gazillion messages everyday telling us that we need to change the way we look, or eat, or talk, or exist. Messages that tell us we need to simply be better than we are. Often times, these "messages" are connected to some sort of unfounded plan that promises us a pathway to perfection where we will finally be good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, strong enough. Unfortunately, we are being totally set up. Why? Because the media ensures that there is no end to this arduous road to flawlessness, As much as we would like to think we know the media is taking us for a ride, most of us (both male and female) without question jump on the train. Even just for today, let's consider letting that train pull out of the station.

1. Get Educated

Knowledge is power, people. So many of us (ehhem, ME) take what we hear on the news, in the media, or from other people as the ultimate truth. We don't question it or consider that their truth might be different than ours, or that this truth may be a way to keep us stuck so that we can't compete.

So, I am currently re-reading The Beauty Myth, by Naomi Wolf. This masterpiece is completely life changing, and I HIGHLY recommend that any woman (or man) out there reading this post go get this book RIGHT NOW. I actually purchased  The Beauty Myth my freshman year of college as a requirement for a women's studies class that I was taking. I loved the class, but I didn't really read the book. I kind of skimmed some of it, liked some of the ideas, but I didn't really take it much further than that.  Well, I picked this book back up last week, and I couldn't have anticipated the way that my whole world would be flipped upside down. For the first time, I am questioning EVERY beauty ideal that I have for so long enslaved myself with trying to achieve. The Beauty Myth covers the ways in which women have been strategically trapped- both mentally and physically- since the beginning of time. My gosh, you want to talk eye opening? After reading this book, I simply can't subject myself to the torturous thoughts that I have been acting upon all these years. I actually teared up (in anger) yesterday while reading a section of this book. If you are a lady, and you want to know why you always think that there is something wrong with you, READ THIS BOOK. It's not your fault, there is NOTHING wrong with you, and it's no wonder so many women feel like crap about themselves. Some quotes from the book below to give you an idea of just how powerful this book is.

Now, I like to immerse myself in things. It's just my style. While I can't sit around all day reading this book because of that thing called work and life, I have found a way to do both. I do have my own copy of The Beauty Myth, but this time I downloaded it via itunes, and I listen to it while I drive around all day. If you haven't listened to a book on tape, it's a great way to keep your mind stimulated (and not obsessing!).

So for today, I am asking you to get educated. Don't mindlessly follow the masses or what the media is telling you is the path to fulfillment and general awesomeness. Also, remember that these messages from the media and our society trickle down. While I love reading blogs and find many of them to be truly inspiring, I have to remind myself that many of the recommendations that these bloggers promote result from their following of these "messages" that they too are receiving on a constant basis. Just a little food for thought...

Have a beautiful day.

Love and Hugs :)

XO

Sarah

Well, it's been a while!

Hi There!

So, ya... it's been a long time since we've talked! Life has been crazy busy (in an incredibly good way!), and truthfully, I haven't had any leftover brain cells with which to dedicate to bloggy stuff :)



So, when I say life had been crazy busy, basically I'm referring to all the wedding "things" that I had on my plate for the past few months! I'm happy to report that PJ and I tied the knot on September 13th, 2014! It was a truly beautiful (rainy) day- the most meaningful and special day of my life to date- and I can't wait to share more details with you in future posts! I was blessed to find the most amazing vendors (and husband and family!) who made every detail of the big day just perfect :) If you want to check out some of our wedding photos, you can take a look at my photographer's blog to see some of her faves!

http://www.sherrysuttonblog.com/sarahpj-liberty-science-center-wedding/

Our wedding was followed by a luxurious honeymoon week in the Dominican Republic which we spent lounging, eating, swimming, smooching dolphins and sea lions, sipping pina coladas, and getting massages. It was magical. I wonder if my company has any openings as a professional lounger available in the DR... hmmm. I'll have to look into it. I was REALLY good at the whole relaxation thing.



Now, I'm back to real life for the most part. I gotta say, as much as I loved the excitement surrounding the wedding and all of the fun events leading up to the big day, there is something comforting about slipping back into my routine.

Leaving the DR...Wahhh

Along with the mental shift that has come with really and truly understanding what it means to be married, I have undergone some personal thought transitions over the past couple of months as well. Let's just get right into it, shall we?

For the majority of my adolescent/adult life, I have viewed myself as a broken bird. I thought (and certainly at times, still think!) that I needed to be fixed, altered, corrected, or "worked on". I have felt like everyone else had something figured out that I just didn't, and I simply needed to work harder on myself to find that thing that would make me less broken. For me, I have always taken to "fixing" or "filling" myself by focusing on my physical appearance. As I have stated in previous posts, my need to repair myself (like many women and men out there!) resulted in a major battle with body image that has lasted more years than I care to count. Over the years, my body has taken a major beating. It's been starved, and stuffed, and deprived, and berated. It has been praised for being thin, and ridiculed for being more shapely. While there have certainly been unwarranted comments from the outside world, the real abuse has come from the person my body trusts most in this world- ME.  Over the past few months, the thought started to form in my mind that something about the plan of "attack" that I had been enacting all of these years was not working. Perhaps, my perceived failed attempts had something to do with the ummm... attack? What if there was actually nothing wrong with me at all? What if the way my physical body looked was a completely bullshit measurement of my completeness? What if I didn't have to consider whether other people thought I was too big, too small, too curvy, too loud, to chatty, too inquisitive? What if I was whole, and complete, and perfect just as I was?

You see, I have been keeping myself stuck by labeling myself as broken which implies that something needs to be fixed before things can move forward. Guess what, I'm just simply not willing to believe that I have to stand at the starting line fidgetting and adjusting anymore, waiting for that moment when I am perfectly ready to run. I certainly don't regret my past experiences, but I am committed to turning the page with the belief that I am whole right now.

Word.

So, I'm throwing out a challenge here. Whether there is one person reading this post, or a 1000,  I want *you* to call bullshit on this whole idea that you need to "fix" yourself. The media and our society keep us stuck and sell us things by making us feel like we are broken.They capitalize on our biggest universal fears- rejection and disconnection. Dude, get mad about this manipulation and choose to do something different than the masses in response.

This is what it's all about.

Re-framing the way we view ourselves is not easy. It takes work and time- but feeling like shit takes the same if not more work and time. Over the next few weeks, I'm going to post about some things that I am doing differently to ensure that I live each day remembering: I am not broken.

Hugs and Kisses,

Sarah

Splat.

Hey There,

How ya doin' ? Things around here are kind of crazy busy, but it's all good. I'm just trying to remind myself that everything that needs to get done will, and that there are only so many hours in a day! In the moments when I need a reminder that everything is ok, I snuggle my dog who is a big furry ball of love (with most people... )!

Yes, I did crawl into his "condo" with him. I don't think he was particularly fond of the fact that I didn't knock or ask if I could enter, but he let me snuggle nonetheless.  Host with the most :)

  

Sometimes we just need to be held :)

Ok, so you all know that I love my little inspirational nuggets, and the one above could not be more perfect for the story I'm about to share today.

Failure.

Flopping.

Falling short.

Splat.

I don't know about you, but all of these words frankly make me feel a bit icky. Who likes the feeling of failure? I certainly don't, and I find it can be especially prickly when others witness your flop. All sorts of "stuff" comes up.

I suck.

I'm so embarrassed.

Why did I even try that?

I should have known better?

I'll never get to where I want to be.

Now everyone knows that I stink, and I'll never be considered a bad ass again.

MMMmmm. The joys of the inner dialogue. EEK! So, where am I going with this? Last Sunday, I took a yoga class. For those of you who know me, I love practicing yoga solo, and I typically avoid the class setting. There are a few reasons for this, but it mostly boils down to my aversion to scheduling my day around a class. I'm blessed that I have been able to develop a super strong home practice, but because I rarely practice around other yogis, I have become rather uncomfortable taking my practice out into the open. When I'm alone, there is no worrying about knocking someone else over, or checking around the room to see if I'm doing the same thing as the other people in the class, or if other people think I'm "good".  It's just me, my mat, and often times, my pajamas. There is no class fee or snazzy yoga apparel required, and the only person that occasionally gets knocked over is my dog or PJ.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61A3sh31dlY

Back to the yoga class. I have been taking a class on Sunday's for the past few months with an instructor that I absolutely love. I don't go every Sunday, but I try to get there a couple of times a month. Everytime I'm about to leave for the class I think, "I should just practice here, I have a much stronger practice when I go solo." I recognize that this thought process might seem rational, but I've realized that what I am really scared of  is getting distracted and "messing up" in front of other people. I want them to see that I have a strong practice, that I'm dedicated, that I can just zone in an whip out any posture with ease. If you didn't know, this is NOT the point of yoga. I have said before and I will say it again- your relationship with your yoga practice or other form of physical activity- is often quite similar to the way you talked to yourself about and  handle other situations in your life. This idea could not be more true for me.

SO, I go to the class, and at the end we are told to pick an inversion of our choice. I love inversions, and typically in a class setting, I will choose a headstand as this is the most stable inversion and poses the least risk to myself and other class goers if I for some reason topple over. Well, on Sunday, I was feeling ballsy. I practice forearm stand and scorpion regularly in my practice at home, and despite the close proximity of the yogi next to me, I thought, "I got this". We had just had a pretty intense class, so my arms were definitely fatigued. Instead of lifting up into forearm balance with control, I muscled my way into it. I was able to balance for a few breaths before my inner dialogue started.  I began to lose focus, and before I knew it, I was toppling over. It was one of those slo-mo falls where you feel like it takes you 5 minutes to get to the ground.  I somersaulted (not gracefully) out of the arm balance and landed about a millimeter away from the girl next to me who was balancing in headstand. I literally almost created a room of yogi dominoes. I was so psyched that I didn't knock her over, but then I started to beat myself up. "Sarah, this is why you don't arm balance in a packed yoga class. What were you thinking? You could have knocked someone over and pissed them off. To boot, they definitely don't think you have a strong practice. As this dialogue started, I looked up at the yoga teacher who saw the whole thing, and she gave me a big smile and two thumbs up. It was adorable, and totally snapped me out of my self loathing moment. I crawled back onto my mat, and lifted into a more stable headstand, where I remained until we were told to come down.

First off, it took every ounce of my being not to include a picture of me rockin' a kick ass scorpion in this post to show you all that I CAN do it.  But honestly, what would that be proving? The aesthetic of the pose is unarguably beautiful and impressive, but the true measure of one's yoga practice should have NOTHING to do with the ease in which they are able to achieve certain postures. Me posting a photo would come from that same fearful part of me that wanted to portray to my yoga class that I am strong.  Why am I telling you this and why do you care about my yoga splat? I'll tell you why.... because splats are going to happen on a yoga mat, and in life. It's part of growing. If you never take a risk, you will remain stagnant, and your full potential will go unrealized. Failure is kind of awesome, and I was reminded of that by my yoga teacher's big thumbs up. You know why? It means you tried. That my friends is brave, and going for it regardless of the outcome is where the real shit starts to happen. I'm not saying the prospect of falling down is not terrifying... it is. Other people will ALWAYS have opinions and reactions about what you choose to do and the result you may have. Don't get discouraged by that, keep your eyes on the road and remember failure is the first step in learning. It has to happen. If you can learn from it, and continue to put yourself out there, the sky is the limit. The same yoga teacher who applauded my wipe-out said earlier in the class , " Go for it. You might fall, but you might fly. If you don't try, you won't know".

So, I think you get the point of this story. I realize that despite my reluctance, I NEED to be attending yoga class because I'm a little bit afraid of it. Not afraid in a DANGER way (in this case, run!), but afraid in a way that I  know I will become stronger if I continue to show up and face my fear. Find that "thing" in your own life, and continue to go for it. We are all in this together, and we may not all splat simultaneously, but we are all going to fail at some point. It's what follows failure  that can make magic happen.

Oldest living yoga teacher. 93 years young. I'm sure she has had her share of splats.

XO

Sarah

A little light, and a little heavy

Happy hump day, my friends!

I hope you are all having a lovely week so far. My week has been pretty great. I arrived home from my amazing bachelorette weekend on Sunday evening, and I promptly got back into my regular routine on Monday. In other exciting news,  PJ and I picked up our wedding bands on Monday evening and as of today, we are officially one month out from our wedding! Time flies! I was looking at the calendar this morning to determine how many pay checks I will be getting prior to September 13th as it's definitely check writing time, and I was shocked (and frankly hoped I was counting wrong!) that I will be receiving just 3 more pay checks before the big day! Anyone who has planned a wedding knows that as you approach the end date, you essentially start to hemorrhage money. We certainly expected this, it just requires a bit more planning and pinching. I said to my girlfriends as we left our weekend getaway on Sunday that I was quite sad my weekend of being wined and dined on someone else's dime was over! Initially I felt uncomfortable with being treated, but I have to be honest, by the end it was quite nice :)



 

To my amazing girlfriends who planned such a special and spectacular weekend that was so "me", I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am so moved by all the thought, time, and creativity, each of you put into making sure every moment of the weekend consisted of something that I truly loved. I could not be more grateful to have the unwavering support and love of such an amazing and unique group of women. I love each one of you to pieces and the memories we created and the many, many laughs that we shared will forever be a part of me.



 

I do want to shift gears as I wouldn't feel right not addressing the untimely death of Robin Williams. Robin Williams was a part of  my childhood, and I'm sure many of you can relate. As a little girl, I remember watching Mork and Mindy on TV Land with my Mom and Dad. My brother and I desperately tried to replicate the "Nanu, Nanu" hand signal that Mork would do, often to no avail.



 

I am proud to say that I can now perform an effective "nanu" sign, but as a little kid, I couldn't for the life of me get my fingers to stick together and simultaneously separate. Anyone else remember trying to perfect the "Nanu"?



I also remember watching Hook over and over again, and to this day I will stop and watch if I catch it on tv.



What I think of when I hear the name Robin Williams is the happy and insightful character that he portrayed in most of his movies. It's not that I personally knew him, but it's frankly unfathomable to me that this man could have another part of him that was so completely opposite from the character that he played in his movies- a part that was dark and tortured. I remember my mom telling me years back that he had gone to rehab, but I assumed he just liked to party and needed some help reigning it in. Although I never gave it much thought, I supposed that I presumed the cause of his drinking/drugging stemmed from wanting to constantly celebrate. From the outside looking in, who would have thought that this man was so shackled? I certainly wouldn't have.


The point is that you never fully know what type of internal struggle a person is facing. For many people, the projection we show to the world is just that- an at least partly artificial image of how we want people to see us. However, the parts of ourselves that we keep under lock and key are bound to eventually break down the door. While the part of us that puts on a show for the world is trying to protect us from being really seen and thus rejected, this part stifles all other aspects of who we are. We become unable to hear our inner voice, and we begin to act soley from a place of fear. For those of you who have experienced this internal imbalance, the pain and disconnect can feel unbearable. In Robin Williams' case,  he could not longer manage his inner demons, and he felt his only choice was to escape.

Mental illness is not a joke, and Robin William's death was not selfish. When someone is trapped in a world where they cannot create any space from the torture of their demons, they lose the ability to rationalize their emotional state and they become physically and mentally unable  to "live"... even for the people who love them and who they love. While mental illness can certainly be attributed to biology, I believe that some people are more susceptible to mental illness and depending on their circumstances, can almost "catch" it, meaning certain environmental factors may lower their threshold for illness and thus they end up in a very, very dark place.

 

I once said to a person in my life, "I don't understand why people seem so mentally discombobulated...they didn't have a slew of pharmaceuticals to remedy their mental problems back in the day and people got along fine". This person said to me, " Sarah, back in the day, people had a life expectancy of maybe 50, and their societal pressures and expectations were unarguably WAY different than the complex and high pressure world we live in today. If they lived in this world, they too would perhaps consider therapy or medication." Touche.

On that same note, when people are prescribed medication to help treat mental illness, we don't know how their individual biology will react to the medication. The scary thing with medications for mental illness is that it's not like we are simply treating a rash, we are altering their brain's chemical function. If a person does not tolerate a medication well, or they abruptly discontinue it, or they mix it with other altering "substances", shit could potentially hit the fan in a very big, bad way. While I think medication is extremely effective  for some people and can truly create the space for an individual to experience a life they may have not thought possible, many medications are dolled out liberally without the risks and consequences of improper usage being properly discussed and understood. This is a problem... just sayin'.


I have personally struggled with mental illness, and I'm not ashamed of it. I used to be, but I'm not anymore. I now know that the darkness that I often lived with was not my fault, and I was not weak. I did not choose to suffer, and in fact I tried like hell to keep my head above water. It was exhausting, and as much as I tried to project this image of perfection, it was not sustainable. My friends and family have seen me in some pretty ugly places, and while I am so grateful for ALL the blessings I have in my life, there were times where I didn't think that I could possible endure the war that was going on inside of me for one second more. I felt trapped, stuck, and like something was very wrong with me. Fortunately, with support and love, I was able to dig myself out of the darkness and learn how to get comfortable with all the parts of me, even the ones that I didn't want to admit to having. Moving through mental illness is NOT linear. There are peaks and valleys, and breaking free can initially feel like a roller coaster ride-exhilarating one moment and truly terrifying the next. I'm talking, "get me off this freaking ride I don't care if I have to jump out of the cart" terrifying. The ride certainly gets less bumpy, but it's by no means a perfectly straight track. In order to move forward, I believe that YOU have to learn how to accept yourself and take care of yourself. While having support is crucial, ultimately you are the one that needs to learn how to show up for yourself. The good news is, and I speak from experience, that this can be learned if a person can even slightly open up to the possibility that things could be different. I would argue that the challenge here is to first admit that you are not flawed or wrong because u are suffering. It's not your fault, and nothing is inherently wrong with you. Mental illness does not discriminate, and those who are affected by it do not choose to bear the disease. Like any chronic illness,the sad reality is that some individuals who struggle with mental illness might succumb to it's grip. It's unfair, and unpredictable, but so is a disease like cancer. I realize that this is an opinionated post and I truly hope not to offend anyone, but as someone who has been impacted by the shame of mental illness, I felt compelled to share my perspective and a snipit of my story. Most people have been either personally impacted by or presently know someone who struggles with mental illness. I challenge you to think of that person or perhaps yourself before you judge someone's inability to cope with mental illness for a disease of the mind is perhaps one of the most difficult diseases to treat in my humble opinion.

 

Something to think about:

-Glenn Close

XO

Sarah